I know I've only been married for a year, and you might be thinking what does she know, but I can honestly say you learn and grow a lot in the process from day one. So I thought I'd share what I've learnt, observed and realized so far in my experience. The list could go on and on, but these are the few I've decided to share.
- Not everything you read or every advice you hear will work for you; even though it may sound like the brightest and best idea.
- Every union is unique, you have to find what works for you.
- Every man/woman loves differently, so don't expect your spouse to do everything you see or like in another couple. Of course you can admire and make your own variation but in the end, don't force anything.
- Marriage is work (not in a bad way), so you have to put in work to make it work. Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually.
- Know and understand the true meaning of commitment.
- Unspoken understandings/agreement are great, but some just have to be verbalized and agreed upon verbally, because you know what happens when you're mad and you start saying things.
- Marriage is fun, love every moment of it, both the good and bad, that's how you learn and make memories.
- You never stop learning about each other.
- R.E.S.P.E.C.T. That's a very important element.
- Sometimes, the highlight of your day might be watching your spouse sleep peacefully like a baby.
- Trust and rely on each other for everything, don't allow yourself to start feeling like you don't need your spouse for anything or in certain areas. That's how people and things(money, possessions etc) get between you.
- You get out what you put into it literarily.
- Not everyday is rosy and lovey dovey, there are good days and not so good days.
- When your spouse decide to be spontaneous and do something out of the ordinary, go with flow and don't ask a lot of questions.
- Every challenge you face together can bring you closer and make you stronger, so make the best of it and come out on top.
- Patient is a virtue
- Learn to fight fair
- Learn to love your spouse in a way that makes sense to them. (If they love touching, touch a lot. If they love gifts, buy them gifts often. If they love to laugh, crack a lot of jokes...you get the idea)
- You're bound to have disagreements, recognize and accept that you are two different people trying to live as one.
- Don't allow your fight/disagreement to go on more than necessary. Everyday lost in staying mad at your spouse is a day lost in making your marriage better and making memories.
- Marriage is a college is you never graduate from.
- Learn to laugh at yourselves, not everything needs to be handled with an iron fist.
- Know, read and apply the"marriage constitution" Eph 5:21-33. It really comes in handy to put you in check.
Stay blessed!
great thoughts!
ReplyDeletemy husband and i will have been married for two years a month from now and we've learned a lot of the same things..especially learning to laugh at yourself. it's so easy to take things too seriously and forget just how small and insignificant we all, especially in comparison to God. i love your blog so far and i can't wait for more, friend!
morgan
quitetheblog.com
Hi Morgan. Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. Laughing at situations and letting it go is a big one for me. Still trying to get better at it because it's so much easier to flare up. But recognizing and working on it is a step in the right direction.
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